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All or Nothing

Jessie MaComment

"It’s important to be friends first," they say,
"you need slow down, need to be patient,"

but,

as much as I can agree that

this is what’s healthy, ideal
that this is what lasts,

(and as much as I’d like to practice it,)

I will never be able to see myself with someone 
with whom I’m able to 
hold back.

I can never say I’m truly in love
if I was able to wait, think, slowly come 
to feel it.

I can’t be content sharing my life with someone
if I can keep from being reckless, clumsy, desperate
in its inception

"Love is patient, love is kind,"
but sometimes it’s not.

Sometimes it demands, 
sometimes it yells,
sometimes it hurts,
sometimes too much.

because

Allthetime, it wants
allthetime, it shows
allthetime, it cares
all the time, too much.

And it’s not that I choose to be so difficult,
I just 
can’t imagine
something like love
as something that

waits.

 

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 19, 2013