When i think about my 'want' to do something I can almost always trace it back to two sources: Love or Fear:
"Do I want to be with him because I love him, or am I just afraid of being alone?"
"Do I love my job, or am I just too scared to pursue something else?"
"Do I love serving my friends, or am I fearful of being seen as selfish?"
When you're pushed by fear, each step feels heavy. Every action feels contrived. And even the greatest resulting successes feel unfulfilling.
The image of things you thought you wanted start to look blurrier and challenges make you question why you'd even try.
When you're pulled by love, you're not being forced to move forward by an imagined external force. You, quite effortlessly, just follow the deepest, truest parts of your own heart. There is no other 'why' than 'because I want to'. Never the hanging question of 'will it be worth it?,' because it is already worth it.
Love is always worth it.
Listen to your own heart. Trust that it is enough.
As Rumi once said,
"Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray."